We were asked by my professor to interview our moms regarding womanhood. Since my mom is in our province in Zambales, I interviewed her by emailing her my interview questions. Her answers are too wonderful to be just kept as a paper requirement in class, this deserves a blog.
I look up to my mom for everything that she is. I look up to her for being a woman of humility, service and patience (because I am not. YET. Well, I believe I’m in the process. Hehe).
I always tell my friends that my dream in life is not to be a successful career woman someday but to have a lovely family, to be a good mom who raises godly kids and a loving wife to my husband. I HONOR YOU, MOMS! I REALLY DO. :)
Anyway, here’s the interview.
Ano ang konsepto ng pagkababae?
Para sa akin ang konsepto ko ng pagkababae ay ang pagkakaroon ng dignidad,may pagmamamahal at respeto sa sarili, at kayang gampanan ang mga tungkulin niya bilang babae.
Ano ang tungkulin na dapat gampanan ng isang babae?
Tungkulin ng isang babae na panatilihin ang mataas na tingin sa kanya ng sino man at ipamahagi sa iba kung anuman ang mga kaalamanan na mayroon siya at maging mabuting ehemplo sa lipunan na kanyang kinabibilangan.
Paano dapat tinatrato ang isang babae?
Nararapat na tratuhin ang isang babe sa pamamagitan ng pagbibigay sa kanya ng tamang pagmamahal at respeto.
Ano ang konsepto ng pagiging ina?
Para sa akin ang konsepto kong pagiging ina ay handang gawin ang lahat ng nararapat sa kanyang pamilya at handang isakripisyo ang lahat para sa kanyang anak.
Bilang ina, ano ang mga aral na gusto mong ipamahagi sa iyong mga anak?
Ilan sa mga aral na nais kong ipamahagi sa aking mga anak ay ang maging mapagkumbaba sa lahat ng tagumpay na kanilang makakamit at mararating. At higit sa lahat ay ang ilagay ang Panginoon sa sentro ng kanilang buhay.
Paano ka bilang isang ina, ano ang mga istilo na ginagawa mo sa pagpapalaki ng iyong mga anak?
Bilang isang ina ay mabait ako, mapasensiya, maasikaso at mapagbigay ngunit kung minsan ay istrikto din upang maramdaman nila na hindi lahat ng bagay ay maari nilang gawin at makamit.
Paano ka bilang isang maybahay?
Bilang maybahay sinisiguro ko ang kapayapaan – at pagmamahalan ng bawat miyembro ng aking pamilya.
Gaano kahalaga ang tungkulin mo bilang isang asawa at maybahay?
Napakahalaga ng tungkulin ko bilang isang asawa at maybahay dahil dito nahuhubog ang tunay na pagmamahalan at pagsasama naming ng aking asawa.
Paano mo sinisiguro na maaayos ang relasyon mo sa iyong asawa?
Sinisiguro ko na mapanatili ang peace of mind, tiwala at respeto ang bawat isa sa amin.
Bilang isang asawa,paano mo hinaharap ang mga pagkakaiba ng lalaki at ng babae?
Bilang asawa, itinuring ko ang lalake bilang pinuno ng aming tahanan at nararapat na irespeto ang kanyang desisyon. Ang babae naman ang siyang nagiging gabay sa bawat desisyon na kanilang gagawin.
Ano sa tingin mo ang tingin at trato ng mga Pilipibno sa mga babae?
Panahon pa ng ating mga ninuno ay mataas na ang pagtingin at pagtrato ng mga Pilipino sa mga kababaihan. Iginagalang sila at binibigyan ng halaga ang mga tungkulin na ginagampanan nila sa lipunan magpahanggang ngayon.
Kung may gusto kang baguhin sa katangian o nature ng isang babae, ano yun at bakit?
Para sa akin ay wala ng dapat pang baguhin sa katangian ng isang babae dahil kung anuman ang mga katangiang iyon dapat itong pahalagahan ng sino man.
Sino ang mga babaeng tinitingala mo?
Tinitingala ko at hinahangaan ang mga babae na may dignidad, pagpapahalaga sa sarili, may maayos na pamilya at may angking talino.
Sino ang mga babaeng nagbigay ng malaking impluwensiya sa pakatao mo?
Para sa akin ang nagbigay ng malaking impluwensiya sa pagkatao ko ay walang iba kundi ang aking ina, hinahangaan ko siya kung paano niya hinubog ang aking pagkatao kaya naman ganoon din ang ninais kong gawin sa aking mga anak. At isa pa ay ang mga madre na nakasama ko sa aking trabaho, nakita ko sa kanila ang kababaan ng loob, pagkamatulungin sa kapwa at may takot sa Diyos.
Gaano kahalaga para sa iyo ang mga babae sa lipunan?
Napakahalaga ng mga babae dahil na rin sa bahaging ginagampanan nila lalo na sa lipunan,ito ay ang paghawak at pagkontrol ng salapi sa pamilya, may karapatang humawak ng katungkulan, ng karapatan sa mga ari arian, ng pagtatamasa ng patas na karapatan sa lahat ng aspekto ng lipunan, ng kalayaan sa kilos, pananamit, pagnenegosyo at pagtatag ng industriya sa lipunan ng kaniyang kinabibilangan.
25 She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.
26 She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
27 She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
29 “Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all.”
30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
31 Give her the reward she has earned,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.
– Proverbs 31: 25 – 31
My professor was discussing to us in class one afternoon how Rizal perceived women in our society. Being a woman herself, my professor disagrees with Rizal when he said that women should be protected or taken cared of by men – letting her go first, opening the door for her, helping her carry her stuff and the like. And according to her, those kinds of treatment are very westernized and the reason why us Filipinos do it is because we love to adopt the western culture. For her, such actions only communicate that women are weak and looking at women as weak is an insult to our womanhood.
“Miss, I read something from a book and it says something like we should also let men do those for us. They are made to be like that and not acknowledging that we need them is also like an insult to their manhood”, I said after she acknowledged my raise of hand.
She went on and said “Exactly! That’s what the western culture is saying to us, that we should live in a patriarchal society. The western culture is saying that men should be the head, that they should be the one leading us (women). Then she stressed her point some more.
“But Miss, it’s biblical”, I finally blurted out. (1 Timothy 2:11-12)
She took a pause for a moment and then went on again by saying, “Biblical… But if we will look at it that way, even the Bible is written by the Jews, so it’s still western, the context is western.”
I kept silent this time. I was devastated.
I felt devastated not because I wasn’t able to defend my point, I felt devastated because we’re missing the whole point. I was devastated because the truth is, people love to distort the identity and role that God gave to man and to woman. And what saddens me even more is how we let the culture define who we are and who we should be.
I hope we will choose to put our identity in Christ. And that woman will desire to be the woman God made her to be. And man will desire to be the man that God made him to be.
The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” Now the LORD God had formed out of the ground all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field. But for Adam no suitable helper was found.So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh.Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’for she was taken out of man.” – Genesis 2:18-23
“Share two things that you learned from EN2010″, our leadership group leader asked.
How many of you know that that’s a hard one right there? Two? Are you sure? I consumed almost 5 pages of my notes for EN2010 alone!
After some time of thinking what to share, here’s what I decided to share to them:
Can’t think of any better preaching that can conclude the 3-day event than Ptr. Steve’s one word preaching “Honor”. Honor God. It’s very simple and common to us yet sometimes it’s something we tend to forget or take for granted. Sometimes we get too familiar of the phrase “Honor God” that it becomes just a tagline to us. I was reminded of what it really means to honor God.
“Our starting line and our finish line, is the honor of God,”
“The methods maybe different but the bottom line is to honor God.”
“No matter what’s going on in our lives, it’s our place to praise Him.”
-Ptr. Steve Murrell
My prayer is that we will live a life that truly honors Him.
2. Spiritual Family
I was thinking of sharing what I learned from Darlene Zschech’s preaching or Efren Penaflorida’s but I chose to instead share something that God personally revealed to me during EN2010, and that’s the importance of spiritual family. From Day 1 til Day 3, God didn’t fail to remind me that I have His wonderful people around me and no matter where I go, no matter what happens, there are people who I can trust, who will never give up on me, who will support me, pray for me, teach me, mentor me, rebuke me, correct me, be there for me – people who will always point me to God, relationships that pour out back to God. I thank God for spiritual family, for friends that stick closer than a brother, for the church. I love my spiritual family!!! This is an understatement.
That, friends, are my chosen top 2. And the list – long list at that – goes on!
I am currently reading the book “Emotional Purity” by Heather Paulsen. This one’s for the record. I’m halfway through it and really, I’m getting a lot of insights and lessons from it. I wish I can give everyone a copy of this book, especially to the girls. It’s really a must read. Hope to blog about some of the insights I got from it after I finish reading.
For the meantime, I’m posting a poem that I just read from the book. This one’s really worth sharing. Enjoy!
by Russell Kelfer
Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried;
Quietly, patiently, lovingly, God replied.
I plead and I wept for a clue to my fate…
And the Master so gently said, “Wait.”
“Wait? you say wait?” my indignant reply.
“Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By faith I have asked, and I’m claiming your Word.
“My future and all to which I relate
Hangs in the balance, and you tell me to wait?
I’m needing a ‘yes’, a go-ahead sign,
Or even a ‘no’ to which I can resign.
“You promised, dear Lord, that if we believe,
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
And Lord I’ve been asking, and this is my cry:
I’m weary of asking! I need a reply.”
Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate,
As my Master replied again, “Wait.”
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut,
And grumbled to God, “So, I’m waiting for what?
He seemed then to kneel, and His eyes met with mine . . .
and He tenderly said, “I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead and cause mountains to run.
“I could give all you seek and pleased you would be.
You’d have what you want, but you wouldn’t know Me.
You’d not know the depth of my love for each saint.
You’d not know the power that I give to the faint.
“You’d not learn to see through clouds of despair;
You’d not learn to trust just by knowing I’m there.
You’d not know the joy of resting in Me
When darkness and silence are all you can see.
“You’d never experience the fullness of love
When the peace of My spirit descends like a dove.
You would know that I give, and I save, for a start,
But you’d not know the depth of the beat of My heart.
“The glow of my comfort late into the night,
The faith that I give when you walk without sight.
The depth that’s beyond getting just what you ask
From an infinite God who makes what you have last.
“You’d never know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that My grace is sufficient for thee.
Yes, your dearest dreams overnight would come true,
But, oh, the loss, if you missed what I’m doing in you.
“So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see
That the greatest of gifts is to truly know me.
And though oft My answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still . . . Wait.”
Lord, if waiting will make me know You more, then I’d rather wait than to get my desires and my prayers answered in just a snap. I love you more than any of my wants and desires. So I will patiently wait when You tell me to wait.