I was on a bus stop while waiting for a ride back home when I was reminded of a day in summer of 2010. It was the day I thought of resurrecting my blog site and taking blogging seriously.
I remember that moment. It was a day just ordinary like many others. Still freshly wounded from a past hurt that God used to teach me some of the best jewels in life, I felt the need to find an outlet for all that has happened – both the good and the bad. But more than anything else, that day I thought to myself I just want to be a better person – better than that girl who both got hurt and hurt someone else (someday if God permits, I would like to take the courage to sincerely thank that person for giving me some inspiration to use) and better than a blogger who just vents and rants her problems in life.
I couldn’t remember how many times I’ve thought of blogging seriously and how many times I’ve grown cold of that idea. I realize that when you settle on writing about things that are temporary, your passion to write it will also be just temporary. So this time around, I told to myself I’ll try my best to write things that are with more worth and value. I couldn’t think of any better topic to write about that best fits that category than that of the things of God.
If you have read my past blogs (and so sorry if you did) when Multiply was still a fad, you know how I have let wrong emotions to take control of what I was writing. When I look back, I realize how blunt and inappropriate those were and how I wish whoever read it will not anymore remember even a single entry that I have posted.
Why that day in summer of 2010 is much celebrated and why blogging means so much to me is because more than just an outlet or an avenue to practice a skill, God used it and is still constantly using it to remind me and make me understand what it means to be redeemed. There are nights when the memories of my past blogs would creep in and I would remember how I have used writing to showcase things like hatred or insecurity, I couldn’t grasp the thought that despite that, God has still given me the chance to write about things that are totally the opposite – things that breathe life to people. That’s why every time I get to finish a write and someone would say he/she was blessed by it, I couldn’t take any of the credit because I know that apart from Jesus, I am still a blunt and inappropriate blogger.
The beauty of being redeemed is that you don’t have to strive to do anything pleasant in the eyes of God to be redeemed. On the contrary, you do those things because you are redeemed.
This is a true story of mother’s sacrifice during the Japan Earthquake.
After the earthquake had subsided, when the rescuers reached the ruins of a young woman’s house, they saw her dead body through the cracks. But her pose was somehow strange that she knelt on her knees like a person was worshiping; her body was leaning forward, and her two hands were supporting by an object. The collapsed house had crashed her back and her head.
With so many difficulties, the leader of the rescuer team put his hand through a narrow gap on the wall to reach the woman’s body. He was hoping that this woman could be still alive. However, the cold and stiff body told him that she had passed away for sure.
He and the rest of the team left this house and were going to search the next collapsed building. For some reasons, the team leader was driven by a compelling force to go back to the ruin house of the dead woman. Again, he knelt down and used his had through the narrow cracks to search the little space under the dead body. Suddenly, he screamed with excitement, “A child! There is a child!”
The whole team worked together; carefully they removed the piles of ruined objects around the dead woman. There was a 3 months old little boy wrapped in a flowery blanket under his mother’s dead body. Obviously, the woman had made an ultimate sacrifice for saving her son. When her house was falling, she used her body to make a cover to protect her son. The little boy was still sleeping peacefully when the team leader picked him up.
The medical doctor came quickly to exam the little boy. After he opened the blanket, he saw a cell phone inside the blanket. There was a text message on the screen. It said, “If you can survive, you must remember that I love you.” This cell phone was passing around from one hand to another. Every body that read the message wept.” If you can survive, you must remember that I love you.” Such is the mother’s love for her child! – from a friend’s post on Facebook.
There is something about this story that struck me. I guess it’s because I can relate with the story. I share the same experience with the baby – being spared from death through the sacrifice of someone’s life like how that mom sacrificed her life so that her child may have a chance to live. The difference though in our story is that it didn’t happen in Japan but in Jerusalem. It wasn’t a mom but a carpenter. It wasn’t by covering me using his body to protect me from collapsing house but by his body being crucified on the cross.
And I know very well what he did for me and how much he loves me because he has left a message for me too. Not by leaving a text message but by leaving a book-thick of love letter written for me – the Bible.
How I was spared from death and how I got the chance to live? It’s your story too. Because he died and was raised from the death for you too. That’s the reason why you are experiencing life now.
“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” – John 3:16
Have you ever had one of those funny experiences when you made a mistake in front of a lot of people, and all you wish is to just disappear instantly from the face of the earth? I had one of those today.
I had my spiel practiced and memorized. I was called and went up the stage. Time has come to deliver the spiel I have been rehearsing. But there was a problem. Towards the middle of my spiel, I forgot my next line. Uh-oh :O (Okay wait, the stage must be splitting into half right now. Stage please open and eat me now!!!). You know what happened next.
The stage didn’t eat me. But I did survive. Well, barely… messy-ly.
There are always two things that God reminds me every time I speak in front of people: 1) His grace that is enabling me to pull it off excellently even if I am not a public speaker type of a person, 2) my identity in Christ. Tonight He chose to remind me of the latter.
I guess the reason why it hurts so much to make a mistake sometimes is because we have this tendency of making what we are doing as the basis of our identity. So it hits us to the core of our being. Sometimes we make our jobs as our identity. So when your boss didn’t like the idea you have just pitched and he shot it to death, it hurts you so much because though he was only criticizing your idea, you feel like he’s insulting you as a person. Because you made your job as your identity. Your performance as your identity. Your college degree as your identity. Your marriage. Family. Finances. Relationships. Success. Talents and skills.
When I went up that stage, I stood as the speaker. But the moment I went down, I was again Fiona. I was reminded by God that whether I pull it off excellently or I mess up, either way it doesn’t define who I am as a person. We come home from work, we either did well or dropped the ball, either way that shouldn’t define you as a person. You make a beautiful couple or your marriage is starting to fail, either way that doesn’t have to be the basis of your identity.
And good thing it doesn’t. Because if it does, we will be either swimming in pride or sulking into insecurity.
Okay, time to check our hearts. Do you see pride or insecurity down there? You do? Oh my, I see it too!
That’s why Christ came to earth and died on the cross. Because God knows our tendencies. Our tendencies to be boastful when we do good. Our tendencies to feel like a trash when we fail. He knew we will be needing some help. Some of us we have been putting our identity somewhere else and it has been causing us problems. It never satisfies. It hurts. It confuses. Pride. Insecurity. Time to put it on Someone who never fails.
At some point in our lives, we will all make mistakes. In fact, we were all once a big mistake. A failure. But then God loves us so much that He didn’t want us to end up like that.
So then came the One who redeemed us, Jesus Christ. The One who we can always fall back in every time we feel like a mess.
You are too special in the eyes of the King that He sacrificed His own son to death just so you could be His. That’s your true identity. Trust that and you never have to wish again to disappear from the earth when you make a mistake in front of a sea of people. :)
If it that feels like not enough to convince you, you may read these truths you can find in the Bible.
John 1:12 I am God’s child.
Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God
John 15:15 As a disciple, I am a friend of Jesus Christ.
I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.
Romans 5:1 I have been justified.
Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through….Read more